THE SMARTEST VIRUS EVER CREATED

IT KNOWS DISTANCE: At 1.5 meters away from someone it drops to the ground, but any closer and it will kill you.

IT CAN COUNT: As long as there are no more than 5 in a room you are safe, any more than that it will kill you.

IT KNOWS WHAT BUILDINGS IT IS IN: If you’re in a Stadium or Bunnings you’re ok, but if you are at a restaurant or in aged care it will kill you.

IT KNOWS IF YOU ARE EATING: If you are eating you can take your mask off in a restaurant, but if you are not eating you had better put your mask on because it will kill you.

IT KNOWS WHETHER YOU ARE STANDING OR SITTING IN A PUB/CLUB: If you are sitting and drinking you will be ok, but if you stand up and drink it will kill you.

IT KNOWS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN TALKING AND SINGING: If you talk you will be ok, but if you sing it will kill you.

IT KNOWS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN INSTRUMENTS: If you play drums you will be safe, but if you play a flute it will kill you.

IT KNOWS the time and date of curfews in different states.

IT KNOWS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN CHURCH AND PROTESTS: If you protest you will be ok, but if you go to Church it will kill you.

IT KNOWS IF YOU ARE AN ESSENTIAL WORKER OR NOT: If you’re an Essential Worker you can go to work and be safe even though you deal with multiple people everyday, but if you are not an Essential Worker, say an Office Worker, and you work inside with the same people every day, you had better work from home or it will kill you.

HOWEVER, IT IS NOT ALWAYS SO SMART. Even though it knows that smoke up to 0.7 microns in size can fly through your surgical mask, at a minute 0.12 microns the COVID 19 virus cannot figure out how to get in or out.

ALTHOUGH ON BALANCE, I STILL CAN’T UNDERSTAND HOW IT TOLD PEOPLE TO HOARD TOILET PAPER..!!!”